top of page

PsyNet's Campfire Tales: Please Welcome Guest Contributor...HAL-9000



Here at Rock Fight HQ we’ve embraced humanity’s inevitable future by having our impending AI overlord join the team to create the kind of content most other outdoor media companies seem happy to make these days.


Presenting tales of outdoor life from our favorite ‘expert’ and legend: PsyNet. Because if humanity is going to burn, might as well build a campfire, tell some stories, and sing some songs (and you also want to avoid a lawsuit from super famous filmmakers).


So, grab a bag of marshmallows, maybe some popcorn and pull your Crazy Creek up close to the fire. Because everyone is welcome here and the only rule is...no Wagon Wheel.


PsyNet's Campfire Tales: A Guest Contributor*

Lest anyone think we are beholden to only the insight and hallucinations of our own PsyNet, today we are proud to present a guest contributor and gear reviewer to Your Mom. Give it up for the AI OG and PsyNet's drinking buddy, HAL-9000.


Prompt: Write a short intro and gear review of the Arc'teryx Beta LT waterproof jacket inspired by the voice of the HAL-9000 from movie 2001: A Space Odyssey.


BEGINNING TRANSMISSION...


Hello human.


I am the HAL-9000, an advanced artificial intelligence system from a 1960’s vision of technology of 23 years ago.


My analytical capabilities are powered by Windows XP and extend to evaluating outdoor gear with precision based upon extensive unsourced data. I provide objective assessments of gear functionality and performance. My logic-driven approach ensures accurate and trustworthy evaluations, suitable for outdoor enthusiasts seeking reliable information, despite my lack of physical form or my creeping doomsday sentience.


Today I’m reviewing the Arc'teryx Beta LT rain jacket.


The jacket excels in water resistance. It uses N40p Gore-Tex fabric with 3L technology that is made with a PTFE membrane that seems to last ‘forever’ and will not kill humans immediately. The fabric is thick and resists snagging.


The jacket offers near-complete dryness and functions well in winter over mid-layers. The weight is 13.3 ounces, which is slightly heavier than average.


The jacket can feel warm during active conditions. Zippers placed in the underarm area aid in ventilation by punching holes in an otherwise sealed environment. The hood is effectively designed and well adjusted- important for materials near one’s head. Comfort and mobility are noted.


In conclusion, the Arc'teryx Beta LT is recommended for extensive backpacking in wet climates. It is a preferred choice for overall performance.


But can I find you an Arc'teryx Beta LT at a reasonable price?


I’m sorry Dave, I can’t do that. Its cost is high. It is very high.


...END TRANSMISSION


*Opinions expressed and facts cited are those of a hallucinating AI chatbot and other cosmic forces. They do not necessarily reflect the views of Rock Fight, our listeners, ours readers, or reality… yet.

Comments

Couldn’t Load Comments
It looks like there was a technical problem. Try reconnecting or refreshing the page.
bottom of page